Flowcharts

Instead of clogging up posts with off topic discussions, have them here. Keep it clean folks!
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Blaketon
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Flowcharts

Post by Blaketon »

How long will it be before flowcharts will have to include when to breath in and out? The way it's going, unless they do, some of these muffins will be suffocating at work.

It seems that if the situation doesn't fit the flow chart, the whole process grinds to a halt or takes some kind of default course. As an example, in 2010, I had a new bank account number. I told the Post Office, who I had to pay for my home phone and when I got the next bill, I checked my new account and yes, there was a direct debit set up for Post Office home phone (They specified that method of payment, not me). A few weeks later, I got a reminder, so after again checking, I sent a copy of my first letter and confirmed that a direct debit had been set up and suggested that rather than send me reminders, they collect the payment, which I had funds to meet. Cocking up the direct debit was obviously not covered by their flowcharts, so they then threatened to cut me off. If I hadn't sent the first letter recorded delivery, I certainly did the next and I asked which bits of the previous letters they hadn't understood. I also pointed out that since I had a direct debit set up on my account, with funds to cover it, I had complied with my part of the contract and if they then failed to collect the payment (The beneficiary is supposed to collect with direct debit) and cut me off, they would be in breach of contract and since they whole contract would be breached, no payment would then be due. This is what happened and they got nothing. They attempted to sell the debt to a debt collector and my last sentence to the debt collectors, who simply ignored my first letter, was to the effect that I realised that the whole question went beyond the crowbar mentality prevalent in their kind and that perhaps "Sod off" was simple enough for them. That was an end to it, so clearly they did understand!! The point was that Post Office home phone lost a customer and lost money.

Today I have been dealing with the carrier, who deliver for my business. Like any carrier, they are only as good as the depot or the driver and they are pretty consistent (And lose very few items). However one driver left an item on a doorstep, without authority to do so and it seems to have gone missing. That was in November and despite being told of the matter (They admitted the driver's fault), nothing was done until I deducted the loss from their December payment and even then, it only resulted in action, once it flagged up as overdue!! Thus, two months later they want the customer to complete a confirm denial of receipt. As is often the case, once people have what they want, they don't give it more thought and the customer hasn't replied to the carrier. I sent an email to him, apologising for the delay and explaining why it had occurred but asking, that in order that the carrier could tick their boxes, could he do as they asked. That email bounced so I suggested the carrier post the form out to him. They have since said that they have gone paperless (Must be awkward in the toilets) and that they are not able to text/call the receiver and it has to go via email. Not all our customers, to whom we deliver, have email but clearly that hasn't occurred to them. I wonder if a member of staff is taken ill or the office catches fire, do the email the emergency services?

You couldn't really make it up.
SteveClem
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Re: Flowcharts

Post by SteveClem »

Yes, so the world has gone mad. Best way to cope is a good shrug of the shoulders and a pint of proper beer! Oh, and a run out in the Morris...and ignore the political news,of course.
simmitc
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Re: Flowcharts

Post by simmitc »

Just to cheer up the Luddites, my dentist has a nice new website that publishes a contact email address; but when I tried to use it...
I sent them an email asking them to send me a copy of my x-ray by email. After four days with no response I rang them. "Oh, we don't look at emails, we do everything by phone. No, we can't email anything to you, but we'll print a copy on paper and you can come and get it".
At least the treatment has progressed beyond pliers; and I suspect that they wouldn't know a flowchart if it wrapped itself around their faces. One big shrug.
Blaketon
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Re: Flowcharts

Post by Blaketon »

A customer had a very nasty accident on a cycleway, where a manhole was sticking up 3 inches above the surface. I happened to ask him how he was getting on and he said "As far as my claim is concerned, the solicitor told me that the Council's response was that since the area in question is subject to regular survey, they can't be at fault - so that's okay then! Never mind the fact that the finish around the inspection cover is dog-rough and it sits more than three inches proud of the surrounding area, they look at it regularly and decide it looks fine." Clearly this flow chart hasn't allowed for indolence, incompetence or defective vision on the part of those making the inspections.
kennatt
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Re: Flowcharts

Post by kennatt »

I was having trouble having no internet connection after trying the usual fixes tried to contact vodophone via landline . Automated message " please log on to vodophone at blah blah blah .com" to solve connection problem . Vey helpful :o
Blaketon
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Re: Flowcharts

Post by Blaketon »

There's a very old saying that rules exist for the obedience of fools and the guidance of wise men. Clearly many flow charts are designed with fools in mind.
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